Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
