shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
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