Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
