The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
