it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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