when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize