I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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