does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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