The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
