you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
