I wish I only lived at night.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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