Screwed.edu
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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