There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
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