In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
