Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Drunk is not a location!
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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