If i come over, it means nothing
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
