we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
