Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
ugly people sure do ruin things
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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