She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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