Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
