Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
