Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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