okay pat passed out under dana's car
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
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