haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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