marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
