What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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