He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
