he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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