I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
