therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
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