Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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