How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
