I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
