Tell her she can't have a vagina
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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