if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
