Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
