I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Randomize
