and you said cock pushups were impossible
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize
