i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Randomize
