Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Me too!
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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