Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
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