This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
