My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
