There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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