her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
