dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
We got so high we made milksteak
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
