Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
