When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
