8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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