If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
